The Secret Life of William Rehnquist

Last year, I received the March 2010 ABA Journal, and I carefully set it aside to read the Herman Obermayer's article on William Rehnquist. Over a year later, I have now read the seven page article. The article was taken from Obermayer's book on Rehnquist, and so it reads a little choppily, but it conveys good things to know about our former Chief Justice.

The most interesting, from a legal scholar standpoint, is that Rehnquist "respected tradition and order --- intellectual and social, as well as political and economic. He believed that the proven and established should not be rejected until there are substantial reasons to believe that the new is superior." Knowing this about him, it would be interesting to review his opinions to see where he favored the status quo rather than adopting the suggested new interpretation or application.

Other tidbits included his punctual nature, his intentional addiction to cigarettes, his frugality and insistence on living within his means, and his concern for the Supreme Court, as a revered institution. If you get a chance, I'd recommend reading Obermayer's article for a quick read of Rehnquist anecdotes . . . it transforms Rehnquist from a well-respected jurist to a thoughtful guy who got his jollies by betting on political races.

Worthy Mentions from My Wedding

As a completely random post, I wanted to share the names of some people who did an amazing job to help me with my wedding.

My wedding planner -- Megan Godbey

* She is not an official wedding planner, but I would recommend her to ANYONE for any sort of party planning. She was amazing!

My dress-maker extraordinaire -- Tammy Hansen

* Tammy is a long-time family friend, and she helped me figure out what I liked and what I didn't like from various wedding dresses, and then she crafted into existence what I dreamed. She is a god-send, and I am very blessed to have this woman in my life and loving me. See her website at http://homespun-creations.vpweb.com/

My church -- Second Presbyterian Church in Nashville, TN

~ Its simplistic beauty made it so special. See its website http://www.secondpresbyterian.net/. It is SUCH an inspirational place for growing in faith and love.

My minister -- Rev. Annie McClure

- Her cup runneth over . . .

My photographer -- Leslie Rodriguez

* She is Annie's daughter, and she is an amazing photographer, musician, dog-owners, person, etc. See her website at http://capturedbyleslie.com/. If you go to her blog (http://capturedbyleslie.com/blog/), you'll see an entry on Sam's and my wedding along with some of the pictures from it.

My caterer -- Robert Spinelli at Perl Catering

*This man rose to the challenge when I told him I needed to create a meal for 50 people that blended Estonian and Taiwanese foods along with being Jewish-friendly and not having anything fried. He spent months researching and developing a perfect menu, and he delivered an impeccable meal. See his website at http://www.perlcatering.com/.

My reception venue -- The Ambrose House

* The Ambrose House is owned and operated by Elizabeth Gilbreath, who is a real delight to work with. She was so easy-going and relaxed, and the house is absolutely gorgeous. See her website at http://www.eventsnashville.net/ambrose/index.php.

My musicians -- Melissa du Puy and Bob Grant

* Melissa is a converse-wearing musical genius, and she is my favorite musician at church. I could literally listen to her play acoustic stringed instruments (she has many, and I don't know their names) all day long. Her website is http://www.myspace.com/melissadupuy. Bob Grant is the lucky man who got to play with Melissa during the reception. I don't know his website, but he is very, very talented, and I would recommend him to anyone.

My rehearsal dinner venue -- Coco's Italian Market

* My guests were over-joyed at the delicious spread prepared here for them. We rented out the entire dining room, and we feasted on bruschetta, fresh salad, shrimp scampi, penne with homemade meatballs, a chicken and pasta dish, and tiramisu. It was delicious. Their website is http://www.italianmarket.biz/

Berlusconi's Bunga Bungas Go Busta Busta

June 6, 2011's New Yorker had a crazy article by Ariel Levy about Silvio Berlusconi (the Italian prime minister) and his Bunga Bungas (orgies) and other issues with women. Levy tied Berlusconi's behavior and treatment of women to how women are currently being treated in Italy, and I have to say that the misogynistic treatment is disappointing, however, I am going to highlight something of a completely different nature. Soak in this fabulous description of Berlusconi:

When I finally met Berlusconi --- "Mr. Winner, Mr. Machismo," as Flavia Perina described him -- I was shocked. He is tiny, no more than five feet four inches tall. He wears white eyeliner on his lower lids to make his eyes pop in photographs, and he uses heavy foundation on his face, which renders him the same orangey-brown color as the case of "Jersey Shore." His hair is thinning --- "because I had too many girlfriends," he once said, before he got implants -- and dyed a vivid burnt sienna. Despite these efforts, he is not a young seventy-four; Berlusconi, in the words of his best friend, is a bit dilapidated.

Ahhh . . . I love the image. Hats off to you, Ariel Levy, hats off to you.

The Effects of Death

As I mentioned a couple of days ago, I recently got married to a remarkable man. We have dated for about two-and-a-half years, and during those years, the ride of life has been nothing but tumultuous. Part of what makes my husband so amazing is his steadfastness as life kept bucking me off its back. Just one of the difficult situations I lived with included my mom's diagnosis with stage IV endometrial cancer, the nine months of complications after the diagnosis, and her eventual death. My life had been changed, and I am forever deeper as a person because of what I experienced with her and with my father.

After my mom's death, I read numerous books on grieving, and I learned about the genre of death stories. I began to read them with my whole body, often sobbing deeply with empathy, sympathy, and grief of my own. At the age of 27, I understood what they were about. I understood the depths of the emotions and phrases used to describe the indescribable. The June 13 & 20, 2011, edition of The New Yorker includes an article by Aleksandar Hemon titled "The Aquarium" that describes the diagnosis, the the attempted treatment, and the eventual death of his ten-month-old daughter, Isabel. It is a moving account of what his family experienced, and I highly recommend the article for its story. In this posting, though, I want to highlight Hemon's really top-notch writing style with the phrases that so aptly described his points:

- ". . . [we] wept through the moment that divided our life into before and after. Before was now and forever foreclosed, while after was spreading out, like an exploding twinkle star, into a dark universe of pain."

- "We were far away from the world of farmers' markets and blueberries, where children were born and lived, and where grandmothers put granddaughters to sleep. I had never felt as close to another human being as I did that night to my wife."

- "But I'd been cursed with a compulsively catastrophic imagination, and had often involuntarily imagined the worst."

- "She has to construct imaginary narratives in order to try out the words that she suddenly possesses."

- "The words demanded the story."

- "The comfort of routines belonged to the world outside."

- "But we were far more comfortable with the people who were wise enough not to venture into verbal support . . ."

- "If there was a communication problem, it was that there were too many words, and they were far too heavy and too specific to be inflicted on others. . . . We instinctively protected our friends from the knowledge we possessed; we let them think that words had failed, because we knew that they didn't want us to learn the vocabulary we used daily. We were sure that they didn't want to know what we knew; we didn't want to know it, either."

- "There was no one else on the inside with us . . ."

- "The walls of the aquarium we were hanging in were made of other people's words."

- "I'd needed more lived. I, too, had needed another set of parents, and someone other than myself to throw my metaphysical tantrums."

- "And now my memory collapses."

- "How do you step out of a moment like that?"

- "Carrying, like refugees, our large plastic bags full of things, we walked to the garage across the street, got into our car, and drove on the meaningless streets to my sister-in-law's apartment."

- " . . . [we] were left with oceans of love we could no longer dispense . . . ."

- "Her indelible absence is now an organ in our bodies, whose sole function is a continuous secretion of sorrow."

- "Mingus is still going steadily about his alternative-existence business."

I particularly love the line about his memory collapsing --- it is so true. My memory indeed collapsed, but with lots of love and self-acceptance, it has struggled back to standing, just as I have. I cherish this article, and I hope the Hemon family can find peace.

Bullying

Unless you've been living under a rock for the past year or so, you've recognized the burgeoning problem of bullying, whether it be in middle school, high school, college, or beyond. It seems that with the internet, students are now without a safe haven, and the taunting has gone from being isolated to home room or study hall to being broadcast to the entire student body and the world through Facebook, MySpace, and Twitter, among other mediums that I have no idea exist. Appropriately, scholars and law-makers have begun acting to prevent bullying and provide protection and recovery, in a sense, for the bullied.

In the Spring 2011 Vanderbilt Magazine, Sociologist Andre Christie-Mizell was highlighted for his work on the connection between parental neglect and bullying behavior by children. According to Christie-Mizell, "Our behavior is driven by our perception of our world, so if children feel they are not getting enough time and attention from parents, then those feelings have to go somewhere and it appears in interaction with their peers." Even more specifically, it seemed that children who felt that they did not have sufficient time with their fathers (again, this is the perception of the child) then had increased bullying behavior.

Given the chronic absence of fathers in many childrens' lives these days, if this research is correct, then it is no wonder that bullying has increased. Overall, the marriage rate has decreased and many women are bearing and raising children on their own. This has moved from being an inner-city, poverty-related situation to a situation that has become culturally-acceptable even in the suburban, middle-class neighborhoods.

Looking to a solution, Christie-Mizell suggested setting up a regular time for parental/father-child interaction, and doing so with purposeful intention. He described creating an environment where "children know they can expect this time" and depend on it.

Recognizing the current bullying problems American society is facing, the legal system has responded by creating statutes to define and provide remedies for bullying. In Ohio, bullying has been statutorily defined as "any intentional written, verbal, or physical act that a student has exhibited toward another particular student more than once and the behavior both: (a) causes mental or physical harm to the other student; (b) is sufficiently severe, persistent, or pervasive that it creates an intimidating, threatening, or abusive educational environment for the other student." The law applies to all public schools, and it requires all principals to respond and investigate incidents. According to the March/April 2011 Ohio Lawyer Magazine, parents should know their school's policies, their state's laws, and ensure that the school is following the laws. As for online bullying, the Ohio Department of Education Anti-Harassment, Anti-Intimidation, or Anti-Bullying Model Policy states that "harassment, intimidation, or bullying also means electronically transmitted acts also mans electronically transmitted acts, i.e., Internet, cell phone, personal digital assistance (PDA) or wireless hand-held device that a student has exhibited toward another particular student more than once . . ."

These new laws show a definite step in the right direction to begin addressing bullying. As someone who was bullied throughout middle and high school (and even in front of the study hall teacher every morning), it would have been nice to have some way to gain protection. My parents tried talking with the teachers and the principles, but nothing was done. I definitely did not want to draw more attention to myself, but school became unbearable. I was fortunate to survive and flourish when I moved away to college, but not all students are so lucky. Now is the time for parents and communities to take a vested interest in their children to prevent bullying and to apply salves to the wounds inflicted on victims.

We've been taking care of business . . .

It has been a long time since we last posted. Essentially, life got hectic. I finished my book on TennCare while also traveling around the country interviewing with universities as they offered my fiance positions. At the same time, I was planning my wedding (I got married on May 28th!) to my wonderfully intelligent, caring, spiritual, and handsome husband. We took Ella to the beach, and the newest picture is her with sand on her nose from the beach.

When I get some time later today, I will be posting on several of the newest issues in my mind (of course, I'll be citing The New Yorker, the periodical that captivates me, along with other references). Until I get to those, enjoy another picture of ella the dog . . .

This is Ella on the boardwalk at the beach in Alabama. We took a week's trip down there before my husband had to return to Philadelphia. Poor Ella was sick almost the entire trip, but she did have a good couple of days playing in the waves.

This is Ella with a dead squirrel she found in the road and brought home for me to bury. She was exceptionally proud of her find, and I had to tell her that squirrels do not come in the house. This squirrel is buried out back by the raspberry bush. I have two more she brought home that are buried in shallow graves in the front flower bed under the honeysuckle. We prayed for all three squirrel souls and blessed them.